Personal Posts

Mother in law! 

Now most people if you have read my previous post (Click here )would know that I live with my partner Paul and his mum.

Now I’m grateful to her for taking me in two years ago, I’m not going to take that away from her because I don’t know where I would be if it wasn’t for her taking me in! However she is one nasty piece of work! The things she says even if she is drunk I just can’t believe comes out of her mouth!

Now Ivy is 70 years old and she is one of those people that was a stay at home mum never worked, cooked for her husband. Don’t get me wrong I have nothing what so ever against stay at home mum’s I can’t imagine what it’s like! What I don’t like is when she forces her old age views on how I should not work be waiting for Paul to get home have his dinner ready and his lunch, all his clothes ironed! I’m sorry but I completely disagree with all of that totally, especially when I work 5 days a week as well. Me and Paul are a team we have always been we cook together all the time. Now I don’t believe that women should have to do all of that especially when I work as well. A relationship is meant to work both ways you do things for each other that way you both respect each other!

Now most times she screams at me saying I’m no girlfriend, I’m not good for Paul because I don’t have his dinner and lunch ready, or his clothes ironed! She has called me lazy and that he should get a different girlfriend!

Now what I do want to say it’s because of me that he can cook, iron and wash his clothes and right down to making his bed his 30 and he can’t even do that! Now before me he couldn’t do any of that she did everything for him, and that’s one thing that I said I wouldn’t do, I am no ones slave!

Now I’m going to tell you another nasty thing that she has said to me but first I must say before I had a lot of respect for her, but when she said those things I lost all respect for her!

Now every single day even today, she is always saying shit like oh when I got the carpet down you used to do the hoovering for me now that was before I was working full time. She also asks when I’m going to cook a nice meal for her. Now my response is Paul can cook as well!

One time maybe about 2 months ago poison Ivy as I call her, said that I would be a bad mother and that I shouldn’t ever have kids because I haven’t been nurtured properly! I know what a thing to say to a foster kid who is already worried that they might be a bad mother and is insecure!

Now ever since she said that its all I can think about, when my work colleague told me she was pregnant I broke down and cried because I was so worried that I am going to be a terrible one because of my history!

Thank you for reading my post!

(Photo credit: www.themotherish.com)

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10 thoughts on “Mother in law! 

  1. Hugs to you. MIL’s can really be mean and nasty or sweet as pie I’ve found.

    It sounds as if you know who you are in your heart and she is challenging your self view and causing doubts. Please don’t ever let someone else change you because of the cruel things they say. You really only have a few options I see. You can ignore her and let it go, you can leave the relationship, or you can try to explain your point of view in a way that would get through to her.

    How is your partner dealing with this aspect between you and MIL? Has he tried to help any?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. She is really nasty, and I find my self not wanting to be around her! It’s so hard, I find myself breaking down and crying because that’s my fear that I will be a bad mother. And sometimes I think maybe I shouldn’t have a kid! To be fair his mum and him don’t have the greatest relationship, if you have a look at previous posts you can see how bad it gets. Sometimes he doesn’t say anything coz he doesn’t like getting into argument especially if he has just finished work! But he does really defend me so can’t fault him on, but sometime I wish he would say how what she says expects me! She still hasn’t apologised to me for what she said and that was 2 months ago! She just denied it coz he doesn’t believe she said it!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Ugh. I’m glad he does defend you but the denial is a problem. Maybe you can press record on a gadget and get her next time. I’m not even sure talking to her would help.

        I have been in a similar situation with a MIL and it did not end well. Finally though after almost 21 years, I have heard her be nice to clear my name from the onslaught she threw upon me. It’s nice to know now but would have been much better appreciated all those years ago so bitter and angry feelings did not surface.

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      2. Yes I’m glad to! Yes I know I will have to next time! No it differently wouldn’t help probably make things worse. Oh that’s nice, but late! Actually all I have is bitter thought for, and I don’t think that when we do have kids I will ft want her having anything to do with them!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. That’s a terrible thing for you to endure all that…I’m so sorry you have to go through that. The elder can be really sebsisitive in their old age and I guess the best thing you can do is ignore it – one ear in, one ear out.Don’t let it affect you or let your MIL”s attitude get the better of you. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry you have to contend with such a horrid mother-in-law! And I’m also very sorry about what she said to you about child-raising. At this point in time I would not expect an apology, so let this one about how you’d be a ‘bad mother’ go, because you’re only hurting yourself more at this point! Let it go, allow yourself to heal, and the next time she does something that upsets you like that tell your partner – INSIST that she did it – and then tell him that this is really hurting you. If you find yourself truly unable to continue: move out, because YOUR mental health is more important than anything else in the world.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I knows it’s horrible! Moving out is differently something that Iam considering as it’s not healthy for me to be in this environment! X

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