Personal Posts

Am I crazy?

I think that I must be crazy or something. Okay so let me explain, last week after everything that had happened with Paul,he had explained that he had let a lot of his letters slip by, so I offered to open them for him and sort them out. So after he dropped them off, I opened them and I found that a lot of them were about accounts that were about to close or outstanding, insurance, debt management, and tax for his car. These are all important, so I informed him that they all need to be sorted. Therefore I offered to pay some of them to help get him back on track with everything.

However this is where I really think because one of the reasons why I broke up with him is because I was fed up with always having to pay for everything all the time. So here I am, we aren’t together but I’m still paying for his stuff. I feel like I have to help him because I feel responsible for him, like its my fault that he is in this situation in the first place. I then also think that if I help him now then he will never learn or be bothered to do it himself because most of the time that we were together I always did everything for him.

I start to think that would it be best if I took a step back and Paul handle all his own stuff himself, to ensure that he grows up and knows how to handle his finances. Do you think that I am crazy?




4 thoughts on “Am I crazy?

  1. You have a good heart (and obviously a job) and he is taking advantage of you. Sounds like he wanted you to see his bills and get you to pay them (because you feel sorry for him). Indeed, you shouldn’t have to feel responsible for him — he is not your child and you’re not married to him. Cut him loose. His behavior is typical of a drug addict. They know how to pull your strings and have a way about convincing you that they mean well. I dated a drug addict for 4 years and she did exactly the same Paul is doing. They can be so clingy and make it very hard for you to distance yourself from them. This constant need of needing you is not love. Love doesn’t work like that. I will continue to suggest that you sever all ties with him. Start by changing your phone number. Don’t even give him an ultimatum — just cut off all ties immediately. And, most importantly following that is that YOU start to value yourself — save your money. You’ll want to buy a house one day or have college fund for your children. Go out with healthy friends and don’t look back. You WILL never get anywhere with Paul. People like him (and my ex-gf) need serious professional help — something you’re not trained to do. Good luck! (And take action).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I differently need to stop talking to him and let him deal with his own things. But the thing is its me that’s the one offering to do all these things for him, he asked asked one bit he obviously says yes but he doesn’t ask. So I need to stop offering which I find really hard to do?


      1. You want him to like you and that’s why you’re still offering help. Think really hard about what being kind to him is doing to you though — how it hurts, worries you, etc. You don’t deserve to live like that. Like yourself first. Be kind to you. You don’t need Paul. He needs you to pay his bills and be his mama. You’re a smart woman Leigh, don’t let him do this to you.

        Liked by 1 person

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